Act 2 – A Kennel near the Castle
On stage: Baron Hardupaw, his daughter Cinderellapaws and Cinderellapaws’ daughter, the Puss in Lycra Gucci
Cinderellapaws: Oh I’m so unlucky – the other girls have lovely new collars for Christmas and I haven’t got anything, no-one will ever notice me
Gucci: Mum stop whining & hurry up and fetch me some Dreamies
Baron Hardupaw: Now Cinders, get to the cleaning – we’ve no money for help round the kennel these days let alone fancy new collars
Gucci: And then there’s my fur to brush & tail to comb and my lycra to iron
Cinderellapaws: Oh OK then. It’s so unfair though. The cat gets new collars all the time.
Gucci: Get over it Cinders. Cats rule AND you’re my mum so you’d better do it. Milk too please.
Baron Hardupaw: Do what the cat says girl. And bring me a bowl of kibble when you’ve finished. Bark to it.
MillieMoo and LucyLou Cinderellapaws’ pretty sisfurs enter from stage left
MillieMoo: Cinders Cinders! Look what we’ve got! Invitations to a Grand Sausage Ball!
LucyLou: Prince Charming from the big Castle on the Hill is looking for a wife and all girl dogs are invited to the Ball!
MillieMoo: It’s tomorrow and we have to go, we just have to. Just think of all those gorgeous eligible batcheldogs…
LucyLou: Please father can we go?
Baron Hardupaw: You most certainly cannot. How do you think I’m going to afford the groomers plus new collars for all of you?
Gucci: Well I’m going. I’ve been invited to give a cycling demonstration and guided tours of the ramparts *sniggers*
Cinderellapaws: But – Father – you want us to meet nice dogs to marry, how can we do that stuck here in the kennel?
Gucci: Na na na na na, you’re not going. Wait – WHAT? You’ve burnt my Lycra shorts!
Cinderellapaws: Howwwl, whine, life is sooooo unfair, I try to be nice but it never works *flumps down*
Enter stage right Goldoglocks and her two sisfurs
Goldoglocks: Cinders darling! We’ve come for a visit, we’re bored stiff stuck in the woods surrounded by geocachers & people retrieving game
EllieBell: Woof Woof Cinders and we’ve come too, we’re all fed up of the bears not cooking our sausages properly
Cinderellapaws: My dear cousins how are you? What have you got in your paws?
MollieDoll: We met a real rascal on the way here, said he was called Dogdini or something ridiculous
EllieBell: Quite fancied him though…
MollieDoll: Oh Ellie! Stop that right now!
Goldoglocks: Girls! Anyway he gave us these invitations to a Grand Sausage Ball! Can we go? And we might stay with you for a bit afterwards
Baron Hardupaw: Nope, I’m afraid that’s out of the question. Doggy times are hard here and there’s no room for freeloaders.
Goldoglocks: Oh that’s OK, look I’ve got lots and lots of Pets at Home vouchers so we can go get some noms and some new collars
Baron Hardupaw: Not for Cinders, she’s not going anywhere. I need her to guard the kennel if her sisfurs & the cat are all going out
Cinderellapaws: *bursting into tears* It’s no good, I can’t go to the ball and I can’t have a new collar and it’s NOT FAIR
MillieMoo: *whispers* I’m sure we can work it out Cinders, don’t worry, we’ll try and get a collar for you too – if we can afford it *worried ears*
Mollie Doll: *slightly heartlessly* Come on girls or Pets at Home will be closed *whine* We want collars
LucyLou: Ok then let’s go. We’ll bring you some WAGG treats Cinders *kiss*
Exit stage left MillieMoo, LucyLou, Ellie Bell, MollieDoll and Goldoglocks
Gucci: Right I’m off to the groomers and for the final fitting for my new diamond collar
Exit stage right the Puss in Lycra
Baron Hardupaw: I’m off to count my money, make sure this kennel is clean as a whistle by the time I get back
Exit stage left Baron Hardupaw
Cinderellapaws: Will I ever meet my Prince Charming? I wonder *sad & wistful ears*
TO BE CONTINUED ….
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